So, I was reading story about those golden showers allegations that were sketched out in the Steele Dossier. And I realized that it was really important to me to help those of you who didn’t immediately conclude that it sounded exactly like something Trump would do, to reach a logical conclusion more quickly… in the absence of more solid evidence.

The bed and hotel room that the ‘incident’ supposedly took place in, were reported to be the same bed that President and Mrs. Obama had slept in while they themselves were in Moscow.

Now, based on what we already know about Trump…

And, how he feels about erasing, or soiling, Obama’s legacy…

Does Donald Trump seem like the kind of guy who would be involved in something like that? I mean, surely that’s beneath him, right?!

And besides, I heard he’s a germaphobe?

Of course, it’s not like people sometimes hire prostitutes to do things they would otherwise never do, right? Especially stuff they normally consider to be off limits… Or taboo?!

Oh yeah, and besides… Those pesky flight records show he was there overnight.

So, who are you gonna believe? The President of the United States? Or your own lying eyes?!

…Well, he’s just an excitable boy!